Relationship Advice for Women (and Men)

How do you handle your blind spots?

As a simple man, love isn’t about always knowing what’s coming next or understanding why love works the way it does.

We humans try, and usually can, put all our eggs into baskets. Yet, even with our best intentions, those baskets may turn out to be the wrong baskets. Even when you get married and confess your love to the world, the basket 50–60 percent of the time turns out to be incorrect.

This is the thing about relationship advice: the hardest part is that men and women aren’t always aware of their blind spots. For example, if I had known about my anxiety sooner, I would have tried not to throw the love baby out with the anxious bath water. But they’re called blind spots for a reason.

Now I need to witness and care for the unfolding of awareness. Patiently and lovingly and with kindness, because if we can understand how and why we react to our emotions (and blind spots) the way we do, we can better manage our loves, marriages, and lives.

This is what my relationship allows me: the uncovering of my past trauma and purpose and learning to manage my expections and emotions in the present.

This is the intangibly incessant work required of love, dating, and relationships.

Beauty becomes less physical as you go on. Attraction isn’t skin-deep, and the feeling of attraction becomes the hard part because you have to connect. Work at it…